I am going to write quite a memorable part of my last journey to Bangladesh. It is quite interesting, and assured me that there are people in this earth who too think like me. It is not only me the ultra-romantic man who dreams of love, but one can find a few more of the same category.
This journey was obviously a memorable one. May be that will be the last time I have seen my mother alive. Rest about my mother is quite uncertain.
I am not thinking of writing about that part. I will be writing about June 06 2009 after 21:30 hours when my flight started from Dhaka to Dubai on my way back to Bergen.
A beautiful young lady, at her early twenties, had her seat in the same row as mine. She was wearing a black burkha. A burkha is an enveloping outer garment worn by women in some Islamic traditions for the purpose of cloaking the entire body. It is worn over the usual daily clothing (often a long dress or a shalwar kameez or sharee) and removed when the woman returns to the sanctuary of the household. Her face was not totally covered – so one can see her beauty without any difficulty. As a co-passenger of the flight number EK 585 of Emirates from Dhaka to Dubai I received a beautiful smile from that beautiful lady. Obviously as a gentleman I had to return it back with the same coin – I think any idiot would have done the same. Another lady was in between us – so we did not have the opportunity to talk much except a few words here and there. Once she asked a very funny question “why should we use the seat belt”? It seems like that she was mentioning if anything happens we die anyway - can it really help us. My answer to her was “if we sleep we will not fall down on the floor”. She smiled and asked me to go to sleep then. Well the story begins there – that is true, but the real interesting part started after landing at Dubai.
She was travelling alone and that was her first time out of Bangladesh. She was heading to Venice, Italy to meet her husband whom she is married for more than four years. She is from Norshingdi, Bangladesh - not that educated only passed the school level. All these information came to me afterward while waiting for our respective flights at Dubai Airport.
I will call that beautiful lady "Bonolata" to disguise her real name. Surprisingly the real name she has is the same as that of one of my friends of early age. I am talking about 1964 – 1966. I didn’t meet her after that. What a twist of fate – the lady I will be talking about has the same name as of one of my childhood friend.
Well, it started after we landed at Dubai at 00:35 on June 07 2009. I was in a hurry to come out of the carrier. I was supposed to help my aunt (Mami) who was on the same flight but travelling first class. Bonolata was in front of me, expecting some help though didn’t express it explicitly. I didn’t know this was her first time out of Bangladesh at that moment. So I was not bothering about her. I just wanted to move forward to help my aunt. Anyway, I did so keeping her behind me. When I and aunt came out of the airbus and on our way to the bus I saw Bonolata standing alone looked like lost without knowing what to do. It started there. I shouted to her and asked her to come inside the bus. I understood she needed help. I had a lot of time after I leave my Mami so I thought I can always help her after my Mami takes her flight to New York only around 1 hour 40 minutes later. I asked Bonolata to wait for me at a point and went to make the arrangement for my Mami’s check-in.
I came back to Bonolata after a few minutes – she was just relaxing there having no sign of anxiety on her face. As if she is accompanied by someone her own, and waiting for him/her - or she is so familiar of travelling abroad. She gave me a smile and I took a chair beside her. And it started there.
I knew her flight was at 09:50 on June 07 2009 and mine was at 08:00 hours. So, both of us have a lot of time from around 01:00 hours. I was thinking of taking a nap and asked her to do the same. But the first thing she told me after introducing herself and mentioning the reason for her travel is “I will not sleep and I will not let you sleep – we will talk”. As if it should be like that – as if she deserves it from me – as if we had an agreement from before and thus I can’t sleep then. Well, the claim was so natural from her side that I didn’t have an option but to follow her. And it started there. We started talking. Certainly, I realize now, these few hours of our conversation became a memory of my life time.
Both of her arms were decorated with Alpona painted with Mehedi colour. Alpona is Bengal’s (Bangladesh and West Bengal, India) most creative expressions of graphic art. It is basically created to drive away the influence of omen and welcome peace, wealth, health and ever lasting happiness. Alpona was originally performed in villages by the girls to decorate the door-fronts, floors and the places before the idols of God. People decorate their houses with Alpona especially for wedding ceremonies. Alpona is as well used to adorn oneself by painting on ones face, arms, feet in different social and religious occasions. And Bonolata's arms were bejewelled with Alpona. She opened both her arms to show me the pieces of beauty – and they were really beautiful. If truth be told I am in no doubt John Keats was correct by writing (From John Keats' epic poem, Endymion, 1818):
“A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:
Its loveliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.”
Bonolata was having a pair of Nupurs (traditional ankle bell ornament called Nupur, which has for centuries adorned every movement of Indian dance) one of my favourite ornaments. I wished all my life that my life partner will have Nupurs so that I can hear the music of her walking all through my life. Bonolata expressed her love for Nupur by saying “I never go anywhere without ornamenting myself with Nupur”. Her in-laws family who are a bit conservative Muslim does not like that. As a result she bought a pair of custom made Nupurs which does not make much sound. Well, she was ornamented with those. She opened her ankles from the burkha to show the Nupurs. I came to know later that she does not like to wear burkha even, but have to do it for the sake of her in-laws family. I was thinking when I get my beloved one I will ornament her with Nupurs and look at her ankles praising the most beautiful thing in this earth. I wish my dream will come true one day very near future. I did not have the fortune so long of listening the music of walking of my love. I wish I can hear it someday.
I came to know that Bonolata’s husband doesn’t like she goes out. He is just envious to show her to the outer world. What a fool – one should be proud of showing a piece of beauty one owns and be proud of that. Why should one has to be so jealous is not understandable to me. I wish I can shout at the world and say look at my beloved one – look so beautiful she is. I came to know her husband is working at a Bangladeshi restaurant - doing some odd job. I am sure she is going to have an imprisoned life. She said she will accept whatever it is – surrendered to her destiny. Yes, what a destiny.
The most interesting part of our conversation was the description of her dream to have a journey by boat on a moon light night with someone she loves most in this world. She will be dressed in a sharee – a quite non-expensive one from a village market – in a way the village girls in Bangladesh wear. She dreams, on a moon light night, she will wear it in a way the village girls in Bangladesh wear it – having a big red tip (spot made of colours) on her forehead and will have a journey by boat only with her beloved one. There will only she and him there – no one else around them. The moon will be reflecting on the water and she will try to hold that shadow of moon with her hand. What a dream almost same as mine - dancing on a moonlight night under the open sky - dancing with the music of silence. She will have her beloved one wearing lungi and T-shirt same as that a village man does. Both of them will be having a journey of heavenly love in this world. What a similar dream I do have too. I have a dream to hold my beloved one and dancing together. We shall dance. We shall dance with the music of silent moon light night – and only with the music of silence. There will be no word but only the music of silent moon light night under the open sky – and we will be dancing. The moon light will be shining at my beloved one’s face and I will be looking at it. And I will be wishing that night never ends. Yes, quite a similar dream I have as that of Bonolata.
Listening her dream I told Bonolata that both of us have the same dream, but we can never be in the same dream together in this life. She laughed after listening my words - I don't know why - I don't know whether she understood what I meant. The probability of meeting each other once again is next to zero. Both of us know that. I know we will never be together again, but she will be with me for the rest of my life. We come across so many events while travelling through the journey of time. All those remain there as memories – nothing gets lost - having some of those so prominent that we remember those all the time – we call those memorable. My meeting with Bonolata will be one of those events in my life which is unforgettable. Yes, I will remember Bonolata for the rest of my life as a memorable one. She will be shining as a star in my sky of memories.
Bonolata requested her husband once for fulfilling her dream, but got a denial – he laughed at her plan. Her dream remains as a dream. She doesn’t know whether it can come true some day - may be not, not in this life time. What a fool her husband is who can deny a night that could have been the most valuable night for the whole life – a night one can think of having only in the heaven. How can someone deny such a gift in this God’s earth? I think the act of her dream is just a gift given directly by God to a man through a woman. Alas! There are people who don’t deserve it.
Both of us knew the probability of meeting each other once again is next to zero. She allowed me to take her picture before we left each other – she allowed me to take a photo of her ankles ornamented with the Nupurs – just as a memory of those particular six hours. Bonolata gave me a photograph of herself putting her autograph, a signature and the date, on its back. I have those with me. I wish to have those to remember her who let me know I can still find someone who dreams like me - a crazy one.
I left Bonolata at around seven in the morning. I had to catch my flight from Dubai to London on my way back to Bergen . We hugged each other, I wished her all the happiness and she asked for my doa (best wishes). Those were the last words between us. When I close my eyes I can still see the farewell smile on her face. A story started with a smile and ended with a smile. The only difference is the first one is just a formal one, and the last is from the heart accepting me as her well-wisher. I can still see Bonolata moving towards gate number 220 at the Dubai Airport having me on her sight. I can still see the farewell smile on her face. It seems to me as if the whole thing was just a dream – as if Bonolata was there in my dream. And, that is the time with Bonolata.
Well, I feel for Bonolata. I know what a life she is going to face. As being born in a poor country many of us left the beloved surroundings in Bangladesh for the sake of better opportunity. Many of us are just opportunists – looking for more and more. Many of us are sacrificing own interests for the sake of a bit of happiness of the greater family and/or for the so called happiness of the next generation. That is what we the immigrants from a poor country to a wealthy one are. I know her dreams will be crashed with the reality of a migrant life – a life without having the known and beloved surroundings around her. I know she will face a cultural shock – I know she will face an identity crisis. I know she will accept it, because she has to, as she accepted so many things as her destiny earlier. There will be no other alternative for her but to move with the time – in this world the show must go on – yes, the show must go on – that is the truth and only truth, and no one can deny that – no one can refrain from that fact. May be she will be dreaming for the rest of her life to have a journey by boat on a moon light night with someone she loves most in this world - a journey with love for some heavenly moments – but unfortunately and most probably the reality will be a journey where the life is not a bed of roses - facing ignorance, and an uninterrupted struggle for survival. She will have to face the slavery of time and reality as we all are facing in this world for our survival in the quest of happiness.
I wish and I wish with all my heart, some day some where my Bonolata can realize her dream of a journey by boat on a moon light night with someone she loves most in this world, as I wish to achieve the same for myself too - some day some where with someone who really loves me. I wish Bonolata all the happiness in her life – Bonolata will have her place in my heart for ever as someone who showed me the strength for surviving in any situation.
Yes, Bonolata will be in my heart for ever as someone who gave me the courage and inspiration to have the serenity to accept the things one cannot change (accepting burkha), The courage to change the things one can (ordered personalized nupur), And the wisdom to know the difference.
This journey was obviously a memorable one. May be that will be the last time I have seen my mother alive. Rest about my mother is quite uncertain.
I am not thinking of writing about that part. I will be writing about June 06 2009 after 21:30 hours when my flight started from Dhaka to Dubai on my way back to Bergen.
A beautiful young lady, at her early twenties, had her seat in the same row as mine. She was wearing a black burkha. A burkha is an enveloping outer garment worn by women in some Islamic traditions for the purpose of cloaking the entire body. It is worn over the usual daily clothing (often a long dress or a shalwar kameez or sharee) and removed when the woman returns to the sanctuary of the household. Her face was not totally covered – so one can see her beauty without any difficulty. As a co-passenger of the flight number EK 585 of Emirates from Dhaka to Dubai I received a beautiful smile from that beautiful lady. Obviously as a gentleman I had to return it back with the same coin – I think any idiot would have done the same. Another lady was in between us – so we did not have the opportunity to talk much except a few words here and there. Once she asked a very funny question “why should we use the seat belt”? It seems like that she was mentioning if anything happens we die anyway - can it really help us. My answer to her was “if we sleep we will not fall down on the floor”. She smiled and asked me to go to sleep then. Well the story begins there – that is true, but the real interesting part started after landing at Dubai.
She was travelling alone and that was her first time out of Bangladesh. She was heading to Venice, Italy to meet her husband whom she is married for more than four years. She is from Norshingdi, Bangladesh - not that educated only passed the school level. All these information came to me afterward while waiting for our respective flights at Dubai Airport.
I will call that beautiful lady "Bonolata" to disguise her real name. Surprisingly the real name she has is the same as that of one of my friends of early age. I am talking about 1964 – 1966. I didn’t meet her after that. What a twist of fate – the lady I will be talking about has the same name as of one of my childhood friend.
Well, it started after we landed at Dubai at 00:35 on June 07 2009. I was in a hurry to come out of the carrier. I was supposed to help my aunt (Mami) who was on the same flight but travelling first class. Bonolata was in front of me, expecting some help though didn’t express it explicitly. I didn’t know this was her first time out of Bangladesh at that moment. So I was not bothering about her. I just wanted to move forward to help my aunt. Anyway, I did so keeping her behind me. When I and aunt came out of the airbus and on our way to the bus I saw Bonolata standing alone looked like lost without knowing what to do. It started there. I shouted to her and asked her to come inside the bus. I understood she needed help. I had a lot of time after I leave my Mami so I thought I can always help her after my Mami takes her flight to New York only around 1 hour 40 minutes later. I asked Bonolata to wait for me at a point and went to make the arrangement for my Mami’s check-in.
I came back to Bonolata after a few minutes – she was just relaxing there having no sign of anxiety on her face. As if she is accompanied by someone her own, and waiting for him/her - or she is so familiar of travelling abroad. She gave me a smile and I took a chair beside her. And it started there.
I knew her flight was at 09:50 on June 07 2009 and mine was at 08:00 hours. So, both of us have a lot of time from around 01:00 hours. I was thinking of taking a nap and asked her to do the same. But the first thing she told me after introducing herself and mentioning the reason for her travel is “I will not sleep and I will not let you sleep – we will talk”. As if it should be like that – as if she deserves it from me – as if we had an agreement from before and thus I can’t sleep then. Well, the claim was so natural from her side that I didn’t have an option but to follow her. And it started there. We started talking. Certainly, I realize now, these few hours of our conversation became a memory of my life time.
Both of her arms were decorated with Alpona painted with Mehedi colour. Alpona is Bengal’s (Bangladesh and West Bengal, India) most creative expressions of graphic art. It is basically created to drive away the influence of omen and welcome peace, wealth, health and ever lasting happiness. Alpona was originally performed in villages by the girls to decorate the door-fronts, floors and the places before the idols of God. People decorate their houses with Alpona especially for wedding ceremonies. Alpona is as well used to adorn oneself by painting on ones face, arms, feet in different social and religious occasions. And Bonolata's arms were bejewelled with Alpona. She opened both her arms to show me the pieces of beauty – and they were really beautiful. If truth be told I am in no doubt John Keats was correct by writing (From John Keats' epic poem, Endymion, 1818):
“A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:
Its loveliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.”
Bonolata was having a pair of Nupurs (traditional ankle bell ornament called Nupur, which has for centuries adorned every movement of Indian dance) one of my favourite ornaments. I wished all my life that my life partner will have Nupurs so that I can hear the music of her walking all through my life. Bonolata expressed her love for Nupur by saying “I never go anywhere without ornamenting myself with Nupur”. Her in-laws family who are a bit conservative Muslim does not like that. As a result she bought a pair of custom made Nupurs which does not make much sound. Well, she was ornamented with those. She opened her ankles from the burkha to show the Nupurs. I came to know later that she does not like to wear burkha even, but have to do it for the sake of her in-laws family. I was thinking when I get my beloved one I will ornament her with Nupurs and look at her ankles praising the most beautiful thing in this earth. I wish my dream will come true one day very near future. I did not have the fortune so long of listening the music of walking of my love. I wish I can hear it someday.
I came to know that Bonolata’s husband doesn’t like she goes out. He is just envious to show her to the outer world. What a fool – one should be proud of showing a piece of beauty one owns and be proud of that. Why should one has to be so jealous is not understandable to me. I wish I can shout at the world and say look at my beloved one – look so beautiful she is. I came to know her husband is working at a Bangladeshi restaurant - doing some odd job. I am sure she is going to have an imprisoned life. She said she will accept whatever it is – surrendered to her destiny. Yes, what a destiny.
The most interesting part of our conversation was the description of her dream to have a journey by boat on a moon light night with someone she loves most in this world. She will be dressed in a sharee – a quite non-expensive one from a village market – in a way the village girls in Bangladesh wear. She dreams, on a moon light night, she will wear it in a way the village girls in Bangladesh wear it – having a big red tip (spot made of colours) on her forehead and will have a journey by boat only with her beloved one. There will only she and him there – no one else around them. The moon will be reflecting on the water and she will try to hold that shadow of moon with her hand. What a dream almost same as mine - dancing on a moonlight night under the open sky - dancing with the music of silence. She will have her beloved one wearing lungi and T-shirt same as that a village man does. Both of them will be having a journey of heavenly love in this world. What a similar dream I do have too. I have a dream to hold my beloved one and dancing together. We shall dance. We shall dance with the music of silent moon light night – and only with the music of silence. There will be no word but only the music of silent moon light night under the open sky – and we will be dancing. The moon light will be shining at my beloved one’s face and I will be looking at it. And I will be wishing that night never ends. Yes, quite a similar dream I have as that of Bonolata.
Listening her dream I told Bonolata that both of us have the same dream, but we can never be in the same dream together in this life. She laughed after listening my words - I don't know why - I don't know whether she understood what I meant. The probability of meeting each other once again is next to zero. Both of us know that. I know we will never be together again, but she will be with me for the rest of my life. We come across so many events while travelling through the journey of time. All those remain there as memories – nothing gets lost - having some of those so prominent that we remember those all the time – we call those memorable. My meeting with Bonolata will be one of those events in my life which is unforgettable. Yes, I will remember Bonolata for the rest of my life as a memorable one. She will be shining as a star in my sky of memories.
Bonolata requested her husband once for fulfilling her dream, but got a denial – he laughed at her plan. Her dream remains as a dream. She doesn’t know whether it can come true some day - may be not, not in this life time. What a fool her husband is who can deny a night that could have been the most valuable night for the whole life – a night one can think of having only in the heaven. How can someone deny such a gift in this God’s earth? I think the act of her dream is just a gift given directly by God to a man through a woman. Alas! There are people who don’t deserve it.
Both of us knew the probability of meeting each other once again is next to zero. She allowed me to take her picture before we left each other – she allowed me to take a photo of her ankles ornamented with the Nupurs – just as a memory of those particular six hours. Bonolata gave me a photograph of herself putting her autograph, a signature and the date, on its back. I have those with me. I wish to have those to remember her who let me know I can still find someone who dreams like me - a crazy one.
I left Bonolata at around seven in the morning. I had to catch my flight from Dubai to London on my way back to Bergen . We hugged each other, I wished her all the happiness and she asked for my doa (best wishes). Those were the last words between us. When I close my eyes I can still see the farewell smile on her face. A story started with a smile and ended with a smile. The only difference is the first one is just a formal one, and the last is from the heart accepting me as her well-wisher. I can still see Bonolata moving towards gate number 220 at the Dubai Airport having me on her sight. I can still see the farewell smile on her face. It seems to me as if the whole thing was just a dream – as if Bonolata was there in my dream. And, that is the time with Bonolata.
Well, I feel for Bonolata. I know what a life she is going to face. As being born in a poor country many of us left the beloved surroundings in Bangladesh for the sake of better opportunity. Many of us are just opportunists – looking for more and more. Many of us are sacrificing own interests for the sake of a bit of happiness of the greater family and/or for the so called happiness of the next generation. That is what we the immigrants from a poor country to a wealthy one are. I know her dreams will be crashed with the reality of a migrant life – a life without having the known and beloved surroundings around her. I know she will face a cultural shock – I know she will face an identity crisis. I know she will accept it, because she has to, as she accepted so many things as her destiny earlier. There will be no other alternative for her but to move with the time – in this world the show must go on – yes, the show must go on – that is the truth and only truth, and no one can deny that – no one can refrain from that fact. May be she will be dreaming for the rest of her life to have a journey by boat on a moon light night with someone she loves most in this world - a journey with love for some heavenly moments – but unfortunately and most probably the reality will be a journey where the life is not a bed of roses - facing ignorance, and an uninterrupted struggle for survival. She will have to face the slavery of time and reality as we all are facing in this world for our survival in the quest of happiness.
I wish and I wish with all my heart, some day some where my Bonolata can realize her dream of a journey by boat on a moon light night with someone she loves most in this world, as I wish to achieve the same for myself too - some day some where with someone who really loves me. I wish Bonolata all the happiness in her life – Bonolata will have her place in my heart for ever as someone who showed me the strength for surviving in any situation.
Yes, Bonolata will be in my heart for ever as someone who gave me the courage and inspiration to have the serenity to accept the things one cannot change (accepting burkha), The courage to change the things one can (ordered personalized nupur), And the wisdom to know the difference.
